How and When to Wean your Baby off a Dummy

Many parents swear blindly that they will never give their child a dummy or pacifier. Such theoretical certainty is all very well but, for better or worse, when faced with the reality of an inconsolable baby, it’s not surprising that many parents quickly change their minds. However, there is inevitably a limit to how long you can and should give your child a dummy.

It can be difficult to know when to stop using a dummy. NHS guidance suggests that if a dummy is introduced early it should be used until six months and then you should try to stop using a dummy by the time your baby is one year old.

In the article below we look at some of the most important considerations and questions you will face when weaning your child off a dummy.

A note on when to give your child their first dummy

Midwives and paediatricians agree that you should not give your baby a dummy in the weeks immediately following birth. This is because studies indicate that children who are given dummies during the early weeks are likely to exclusively breastfeed for a shorter duration (1), most probably because it causes them to experience so-called “nipple confusion”. As such, parents should wait until breastfeeding is established before giving a dummy to their child.

For more information on making the decision to use a dummy, try our “Dummies – the Pros and Cons” article.

Why your child has grown attached to a dummy

Before you begin the process of weaning your baby from the dummy, it can be useful to understand why she is so attached to it. Typically, babies are attached to their dummies for one or more of the following reasons:

• It helps them to settle when they are distressed or agitated.
• It has become a useful aid to sleep.
• It has become a habit.
• It has become a source of security and comfort to them.
• It has become a way for your baby to regulate pressure in the narrow structures of her ears.

Reactions to dummy weaning – every child is different

Every baby is different and every baby will react differently to the dummy weaning process. Some will hardly notice, some will become very agitated and others may develop compensatory behaviours such as thumb-sucking.

Bad-timing – when not to try weaning your baby from the dummy?

If yours and your baby’s life is a little stressful or you are dealing with a change in circumstances or environment, it is probably best to wait before attempting to take the pacifier away. Examples of instances when it may be a good idea to postpone dummy weaning for a while include:

• Beginning nursery or childcare.
• You or your partner have returned to work or begun working new hours.
• You and your partner are experiencing relationship difficulties.
• Family bereavement.
• Moving house.
• Any significant stress or emotional upheaval in the family.

When to wean your baby from a dummy

Although there is evidence to suggest that using a dummy may reduce the chances of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome), the evidence is not strong. As such, the sooner you wean your baby from the dummy the easier it will be.(2)

In fact, the longer your baby uses a dummy, the greater the chances that it will result in some adverse developmental impact such as the following:

• Beyond one year: delays in language development as well as abnormalities in the development of her lip and tongue muscles. Can result in your child developing a lisp.(3).
• Beyond two years: dental problems, including open bite and crossbite. May result in overdevelopment of muscles at the front of the mouth, leading to the development of protruding teeth.
• Three years and beyond: compounds dental and language problems. Your child may require repeated visits to the dentist and orthodontist over childhood and teenage years.

For more information on babies and language skills we have a paediatrician-written page on language development milestones.

It is also worth noting that regular use of a dummy may lead to increased stomach, mouth and middle ear infections, so, as a general rule, try to wean your baby from a dummy at the earliest opportunity.(4)

How to wean your baby from the dummy

In many circumstances it may be best to gradually and gently wean your baby off the dummy. For example, if a situation is relatively low-stress, try not to offer the dummy. Instead, reserve it for those times when your baby is most distressed or perhaps when it is bedtime and you need her to settle. By offering it only sparingly, your baby will have more opportunity to develop self-soothing techniques. Importantly, if you are still giving your baby a dummy at bedtime, try to take it away as soon as she is asleep and then slowly try getting her to bed without it.

Other ideas for baby dummy weaning include:

• Offer a substitute: you can try offering your baby some other form of prop such as a favourite cuddly toy or blanket. However, you as the parent are the ultimate replacement for the dummy, so if you are able to offer some extra attention and close contact at times when she would normally have her dummy, you make the transition that much easier.
• Take away the temptation: sometimes it is a question of “out of sight, out of mind”. As such, remove the dummy to somewhere it cannot be seen as, with any luck, it may eventually be forgotten.
• Don’t mention it: if you keep mentioning the dummy, your child will find it difficult to forget about it, so this one uses the same principle as “out of sight, out of mind”. You don’t want to turn dummy weaning into a battleground, so try to avoid saying things like, “no dummy for you today!” If you can get away with it, it’s better not to mention the dummy at all.
• Make them wait: if you can successfully distract your child to make her wait her a little longer for a dummy, you may help her learn to self-soothe.
• Read and talk around the subject: if your child is a bit older, they will likely have some of the cognitive tools that will enable them to benefit from conversations about dummy weaning. You can read books to them that tackle the issue or can create a star chart to encourage them on their way.
• Be patient: the more patient you are, the easier it will eventually be for your child to part from a dummy. If you get stressed, she will feel stressed too, and this can prove both counterproductive and traumatic.
• Get everyone on the same page: make sure that you, your child’s other parent and anyone else who is involved in the care of your child — i.e. a childminder or grandparent adopt the same approach to the dummy. If you are all on the same page, it will help to prevent confusion, conflict and unnecessary setbacks.
• The dummy fairy: If you feel your child is more or less ready to give up the dummy, but the habit is set, you may wish to use the same strategy for the dummy as with teeth – a ‘dummy fairy’ can leave a reward or gift and take the dummy away and your child may be reassured that this is a valued transition.
• Cold turkey: some children, particularly if they are older, may be able to process and cope with the idea of going cold turkey. However, be sure to offer lots of praise and rewards to encourage your child.

Summary

There are many reasons why your child might have grown attached to a dummy. However, eventually a time will come when they need to be weaned from it. This can be challenging but with love, nurture and discipline both you and your baby will get through the process.

1. https://www.unicef.org.uk/babyfriendly/news-and-research/baby-friendly-research/infant-health-research/infant-health-research-miscellaneous/#:~:text=Two%20studies%20explore%20impact%20of%20dummy%20use%20on%20breastfeeding&text=At%20three%20months%2C%2085.8%25%20infants,pacifier%20group%20were%20exclusively%20breastfeeding.
2. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/reducing-risk-cot-death/
3. https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/HealthyLiving/dummies
4. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5408445/